It’s been a long time since I posted here and I can honestly say this is because I’ve been doing really well.
I am as well as I can ever remember being – no ups, no downs and able to deal with all the drama that goes on around me. I am not yet abe to return to work full time but am coping well on 4 days a week. I am beginning to get more confident in my role and I never thought I would ever be in a place where I could say I am good at my job. I am.
I have also discovered part of the reason I am always so tired and perhaps also why I keep getting depressed with no external factors. This is because my thyroid is underactive. That would explain an awful lot. I have one more blood test to go in a month before they can treat me fot it though.
The down side of being well is I am now starting to think about whether I need to take the meds. I hate taking tablets and although part of me is acceptingo f the fact I will probably be on medicaion for the rest of my life the other part wants to try without. I think in a few months time I may broach it with the consultant.
In other good news I have been discharged from case- coordination as I was too well. I think this has more to do with the mental health cuts and less staff to be allocated workers. Either way I am quite happy with that as I don’t have to see useless nurse anymore and I now know who to contact in a crisis which is useful. My psychology referral hasn’t come to the top of the pile yet so I am still on the pre-assessment waiting list. There is another waiting list after the initial assessment. It has been a long wait and by the time I get to the top I may have fixed myself. At least that’s what I used to hope with my patients, by the time I saw them that they’d have figured out a way to solve their problems.
I am working in a rehab unit for elderly people who have been kicked out of the main hospital. The people that have complicated discharges and need a lot of input and equipment. It is challenging but I do really like my old people. I like assessing them and getting them independent with washing and dressing and in the kitchen. That along with the rather frequenthome visits to deliver toilet seats.
So I am a work in progress at the moment. The challenge will be when I move house in the next few months. How I cope with that will provide a good indicator as to whether I am actualy “in recovery” or just pretending.